I think Russian is an awesome language.

In fact, I’ve been wanting to learn it for quite some time. So at Borders today I didn’t pass up the chance to leaf through Russian for Dummies. Granted, I didn’t retain much of it, except for this incredibly useful phrase: S lyogkim parom! or literally, Congratulations on a light steam!

Let me explain “incredibly useful,” all facetious undertones aside. The phrase is used in Russian culture toward anyone who leaves a shower, sauna, or any place where you can, let’s say, clean yourself. (This is where you brainstorm innumerable volumes of applications for this.) I think we need a phrase like this in English. I’m thinking perhaps of a national commercial hygiene initiative, in which a charismatic, well-to-do spokesperson bestows his congratulations on all for their impeccable cleaning habits. (Think Walt Frasier meets Cinema of Russia.) It would inspire national morale, boost the economy, and promote cleanliness in an otherwise repulsive population.

I’m standing in line at Akron-Canton, tapping away in Pocket IE to pass the time. Something like generic Beach Boys is wafting down from a speaker above our heads.

Today Steph is leaving for China for three months, essentially the whole summer. She will be flying to Chicago, and then thirteen hours and seventeen minutes later she will be arriving in Beijing. Assuming the government there hasn’t blocked Crunching Numbers, she might find an idle moment in which to provide updates via the blog.

My battery’s running low, and I don’t know how much more airport music I can stand.